It occurs to me that subjects that are normally taboo in polite conversation frequently get discussed here. Things I don't routinely tell people... you all somehow end up knowing. You know I hate shaving my legs. You know I randomly drive up into other people's driveways. You know I get stuck in toilets. However, I think this one might be almost worse.
Coach and I occasionally play this game back and forth with each other where we point out how much like which parent the boys are. Ok, ok... we're really trying to lay blame for bad habits or disgusting quirks. Whatever. The point is that most of the really foul things can be laid at Coach's feet. After all, I'm the mama.... how could I possibly have contributed even one iota of ickiness to my precious babies?
Bug has the most atrociously rotten smelling feet of anyone I've ever known. Except for my baby brother. His can be smelled for MILES. Literally. Really... all we'd need to do to end the war right now is just have him take his shoes off at the Iraqi borders. Worse than the gas chamber, I'm tellin' ya. Anyway, Bug's are horrible. Really horrible. Especially after practice. Or a hard day at school. Or even just 20 minutes out of the shower. And I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned it or not, but with his sensory issues.... this child (up until the last couple of months---I'm so proud of him! But I digress......) has worn socks Every Second of Every Minute of Every day that wasn't spent in the shower. Since he was tiny. He simply needed to have socks on his feet ALL.THE.TIME. Which worked fantastic for his sensory issues, leaving him free to feel comfortable enough to go to sleep or whatever he wanted to do. What it did not work so fantastically for was the smell. Especially after we moved to Hell... I mean, Arizona. Where we've discovered that the high temperatures have a tendency to strengthen the more... shall we say, pungent? odors.
Its so bad that the dogs won't even spend any time in his room. And they go around sniffing each other's butts all the time!
Unfortunately, this is something my poor, afflicted baby gets from me. (Guess you already figured that out, though, huh? Since this blog is always about me, and I pointed out the genetic link with the stinky baby brother up there?) Its a good thing Coach doesn't have the greatest sense of smell (most likely from years of his own noxious gases.... which he was generous enough to pass down to Jock. *sigh* Which is worse? The raunchy feet, or the constant green cloud around those two? With any luck, the world may never know.....), or my feet could have been a deal breaker in the early days.
I fear greatly for Bug's ability to keep a mate with these feet. She's simply going to have to fall in love so completely, incredibly quickly. Before he has a chance to take off his shoes.