When I first started having children (ha! that sounds like I have an entire brood, rather than just the two I've got), there are certain things I never really expected myself to say, and things I just never imagined hearing. Not because they're awful or shocking, just that it never occurred to me.
Bug: Mom, what would you say if I told you I got a girl's phone number?
Me: Well, first I'd tell you that you're saying it wrong. You should be saying it like this: "Duuuu-uude... I got DIGITS!"
Or how about this one?
Bug: Hey Mom.... I got a hug today from a girl I don't know. She said it was because I was cool.
Me: Honey, you really shouldn't be hugging strange girls.
Jock (busting out laughing, but offering this advice in all sincerity): Dude, don't listen to her. You should be hugging as many girls as you can, whether you know them or not!
And then there's this one....
Me: Bug, make sure to brush your teeth before you head out for school this morning. Girls like that in a boy.
Bug: Got it. And I'm all over that one, Mom.
Do you see what I mean? Who ever imagines themselves telling their sons to do something because girls will like that? Puberty was hard enough when Jock entered into it. And when Bug first started learning about what will happen to him as his body changes, it was entertaining listening to him get excited about needing to use deodorant now.
And Heaven help me.... I was appalled and amused all at the same time when I caught him picking a shirt up off his floor and smelling the armpit to see if he'd worn it yet.
It's official, now. My boys are no longer babies. And they have the body odor to prove it.
Bug: Mom, what would you say if I told you I got a girl's phone number?
Me: Well, first I'd tell you that you're saying it wrong. You should be saying it like this: "Duuuu-uude... I got DIGITS!"
Or how about this one?
Bug: Hey Mom.... I got a hug today from a girl I don't know. She said it was because I was cool.
Me: Honey, you really shouldn't be hugging strange girls.
Jock (busting out laughing, but offering this advice in all sincerity): Dude, don't listen to her. You should be hugging as many girls as you can, whether you know them or not!
And then there's this one....
Me: Bug, make sure to brush your teeth before you head out for school this morning. Girls like that in a boy.
Bug: Got it. And I'm all over that one, Mom.
Do you see what I mean? Who ever imagines themselves telling their sons to do something because girls will like that? Puberty was hard enough when Jock entered into it. And when Bug first started learning about what will happen to him as his body changes, it was entertaining listening to him get excited about needing to use deodorant now.
And Heaven help me.... I was appalled and amused all at the same time when I caught him picking a shirt up off his floor and smelling the armpit to see if he'd worn it yet.
It's official, now. My boys are no longer babies. And they have the body odor to prove it.
8 comments:
I. LOVED. This. Post! I nodded my head through the whole thing...LOVE those stinky boys of ours!!
oh, I'm not ready for this yet!!
loved your post
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That was the funniest post I've read all day! I love your response about the girls phone #. I am terrified for teenage years. I have three girls, enough said.
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oh my gosh! This is so funny and WAY too true!
hahaha this was hilarious. getting hugs because he's cool, eh? he must be doing something right. he should be able to keep this "cool" status by continuing to smell the armpits of his shirts to ensure they're clean. dirty shirts definitely down the cool factor, id say.
love it! but don't ya think it's flattering that girls would wanna hug your boys, and give them their digits? totally flattering. yay!
Hehehe...I enjoyed this post, especially the last line. Reading about your sons always brings something about my brother to my mind, somehow. Maybe because I can relate to what you write about even though I'm a teenager myself. Right now I was remembering how, once when he caught me staring at him while he put on body spray in liberal amounts: "Hey--this is hot stuff! All the girls ask me what brand it is!"
Boys.
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