Thursday, November 5, 2009

The Chapter of The Parenting Handbook They Left Out

Have you ever really, I mean REALLY thought about some of the movies and TV shows that you've always found the funniest? Not the ones that were necessarily approved by your parents when you were younger (although I could just about guarantee that when you weren't around they were laughing at least as hard as you were at them); but the ones that made you laugh the most.  There was always an element in them that you somehow recognized and identified with, right?  Something that made you think Yeah! My life is JUST like that!

Movies like the American Pie series or Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Maybe you still sneak in a viewing of Risky Business or Ferris Bueller's Day Off from time to time?  Or just about any John Hughes movie from the 80's.  Or maybe you find yourself laughing at each rerun you catch of That 70's Show when it's on five times a night on various cable channels.  Perhaps part of the appeal to these shows and movies is that, for a time, you can remember what it was like to be a teenager. You can remember thinking about nothing but should I or shouldn't I? when it came to sex or certain drugs. You can think back and laugh at how easy it seemed to hide the fact that you were growing up and were no longer a little baby from your parents.

And you continued laughing. Right up until the day it dawned on you that YOU were now a parent of a teenager. A teenager who, along with his friends, stangely and very closely resembles the teenage characters on these shows and in these movies. A teenager who (cue the horror film music here) most likely is thinking near constantly about sex, certain drugs, and how easy it is to hide the fact that he's no longer a baby.

I am beyond thankful that when I ask him, he answers honestly. Do I sometimes get answers that, as his mother, I might rather not actually know? Sure. But I still ask. Does he look at me and tell me it's really kinda awkward to be telling his mother these things? Yeah. But he still tells me. So I tell him how glad I am that he trusts me enough to be honest with me, and he tells me how glad he is that I care enough to be nosy.

Even if I can't laugh at a scene in That 70's Show without a certain amount of queasiness these days.

PhotoStory Friday
Hosted by Cecily and Emily


Flea said...

No joke. It's a scarier world now than it was for our parents. I think. Maybe not.

I was having a convo with Oliver in the car yesterday, talking about dating. He was adamant that he wants to experience pain, earn his own scars. That the breakup with his girl of 6 months wasn't as heart breaking as he thought it would be. Do you know what it all boiled down to? He wants to learn to be an assassin, like in Assassin's Creed. Ultimately, that's what he meant by scars and pain, learning to fence or wield a quarterstaff. That stinker.

Amazing how similar our boys' profiles are. :) Handsome kids both.

Emily said...

I am terrified of the day when I had teenagers! So, what's the secret to making sure they answer honestly?

Hayley @ When I Grow UP said...

Beautiful post! I'm with you. I have a Senior in high school. A daughter. Terrifying, isn't it? But, it sounds like you have one of those special me. Handsome too!

Michelle said...

What a great post. It certainly rings true for me. I have a 14 year old that just entered her first year of High School. It sometimes scares me when I realize what I was doing at her age.

By the way, I went to the High School that Ridgemont High was based on!

Happy PSF!

Crazymamaof6 said...

HOLY CRUD! i live in fear. and i'm afraid i'll have a pack of them all at once. sneaking around. doing risky things. thinking about the STUPID stuff i did, i know what they are capable of. GASP. i think i need to go take a valium now. sheesh. share the secret to keeping them honest and trusting please. and thank you. great post.

Huckdoll said...

You should be so proud of yourself to have that sort of relationship with your children. I hope to have the same someday.

Karen said...

You're not a-kidding. I won't even relate the conversation that I had with my daughter last night, but MY WORD.



Yeh, there are some things that a mother and daughter shouldn't talk about, and yet it needs to happen.

Cecily R said...

Holy crapola. You know very well that this stuff makes me want to throw up...and I still have a few years before I'm where you are. Who know what will happen when I'm actually there. Oy.

P.S. That 70s Show makes me laugh like an idiot.

Heather @ Not a DIY Life said...

I'm so not ready to be the parent of a teenager. good thing our daughter is only 2.5! Hopefully by the time she's there, I'll be a little more prepared (I doubt I'll ever be ready!).

Thanks for sharing!

Heidi said...

You have such a huge point there! I am laughing every night at that 70's show and every day I find myself more and more often connecting with Kitty and Red rather than the teenagers. Its scary! Does that mean I'm getting old?
Great post and I'm glad that you have a son that will talk to you. I hope for the same when my kids are there so if you have any secrets to share, PLEASE DO!
If you'd like to stop by my blog I'm at Cake Crumbs.

Rockin Austin said...

Yeah, you are SO allowed to have those parental freak out moments...just thinking about the stuff I did in HS and I was a good kid. :) Love ya!

Carrie and Troy Keiser said...

I so understand this post. My son is 15 1/2 and might soon (like in 6 months) care about going on a date..