Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Fighting Stereotypes One Household Chore At A Time

While I have for many, many years now considered myself something of a goddess, it has most certainly NOT been a domestic goddess. It has long been an acknowledged statement of fact in my household that I cook simply so my children don't starve, and I clean so the state doesn't take them away from me. I do not enjoy, nor am I very good at, either one of those particular household assignments.

I don't blame my lack of talent or interest on the fact that I'm a working mom. Thousands, if not millions, of other working moms do it all, and they do it all the time. And they enjoy every minute of it.

I don't blame it on being so involved with my boys' athletic lives. They both have several friends whose mothers happily and successfully do everything, while still being able to find time for themselves.

Actually, there really isn't anything TO blame. It just IS. And I'm ok with that. Its taken me a while to get to where I truly am ok with it, but I'm there. I did not marry Ward Cleaver, Mike Brady, Ozzie Nelson, Donna Reed's husband (what was his name, anyway? Mr. Reed?), or even Archie Bunker (although sometimes, with the attitudes thrown around here, its a close one!). I was fortunate enough to marry a man who, while he adores his mother (in all her touch of OCD-superclean house-cooking from scratch-glory... and yes, I adore her too!), he didn't want to marry someone just like her. To be honest, I'm not sure he put much thought into who he wanted to marry. If that man had done even a smidge of pre-screening...... well, lets just say that he'd probably have a different team mom.

My cooking skills are practically non-existent. Ok, ok. That might be a slight exaggeration, but you do all remember the whole spaghetti sauce issue, right? And the whole cleaning thing? There are sooo many other things I'd rather be doing. Pulling my fingernails out one at a time, slowly, is something that comes to mind. Or maybe plucking every single hair on my body?

June Cleaver, Carol Brady, Harriet Nelson and Donna Reed would all probably stage an intervention for me, I'm sure. But I like to think that Edith Bunker would have stood right beside me. You know, to make sure I don't trip over all the cleats, bats, balls, catchers gear and gloves, not to mention backpacks, toy swords and actual dogs that are strung from one end of my house to the other.

7 comments:

Flea said...

So who cleans your house, woman? I mean, I truly envy you your comfort in where you are, since I wish I could not clean and not feel like the wrath of God was going to fall on my head. Once upon a time, I did not care. Now, three children and ONE HUSBAND WHO LIKES ORDER AND CLEANLINESS later, I feel guilty when I don't clean. Doesn't mean I actually CLEAN or anything ...

Burgh Baby's Mom said...

I just plain quit cleaning about two months ago. I'm still waiting for someone to notice.

(Totally not kidding. Mr. Husband hasn't noticed that I stopped dusting, picking up toys, vacuuming, etc. Sort of tells me that I wasn't actually making a difference anyway.)

Karen said...

While I posted about this very thing and it sounded for all the world like I clean my house with no help from the family, what I'm really talking about is help with just clearing clutter. Things like mopping, scrubbing bathrooms and dusting happen when someone comes over. Which thankfully isn't that often.

Cecily R said...

You and I kindred spirits. I hate house cleaning. I'm terrible at it. Sometimes I try but it never lasts. I'm also afraid of any recipe that has more than 5 ingredients in it.

By the way, you should see the state my house is in right now. It is BAD. I am drowning. Cleaning up after the whole house has sick for a week is going to KILL ME. You know, if I ever I feel good enough to try to clean again.

Huckdoll said...

Sigh. We're on the same level, girl. Yes we are. I'm happy to hear that I'm not alone.

Jennifer H said...

Me, too. I hate to clean, and don't care that much about it. I'm lucky to have a cleaning service come every two weeks, or I swear, my showers would never see a sponge. (Is that what one uses to clean a shower? See?)

Plus, I'm really good at ignoring what needs to be done. My husband needs things neat before he can relax. But he travels a lot, so it doesn't matter so much.

Kalamazoo Mom of 2 said...

DITTO DITTO DITTO! I HATE cleaning. And cooking! And, it's nice to know that I'm not some freak of nature (or if I am, I'm not alone!). I do both out of necessity, and could think of a gazillion things I'd rather do instead!