Every now and again, I get asked if Coach and I ever wish we had a little girl. Disregarding the part where that question kind of sounds like we should regret that we feel our little family is just perfect the way it is, and the fact that while it's not what they say but we hear OH MY GAWD--You mean you actually LIKE having just boys? anyway; we do occasionally decide to answer them.
Although, knowing Coach and I, even the vague, anonymous blog way that most of you do, you probably realize that those answers are just packed full of sarcasm.
Well, when the boys were little we thought we'd try having a little girl. That idea lasted until they realized they were wearing dresses. Plus, the ponytails gave them headaches.
Honestly, Coach and I love parenting boys. There are some amazingly awful life experiences we will get to avoid by not having daughters. An overabundance of estrogen, for one. And while testosterone can be pretty bad, you can at least control it with three simple things: sports, cars and food. Estrogen? Can get fairly pricey to work around.
With boys, even ones of the teenage variety, we seldom have "bad hair days". Those days are called Grab A Hat And Go days in my house.
When noxious odors are discovered at random points of the house, not one Ewwww!! is heard. No, what you'll hear instead is a chorus of AWESOME! Who did that? Of course, since my crew DOES have manners and respect, that phrase is always followed by Sorry, Mom (or Sorry, Honey.. if he realizes he's been found out). Excuse me.
While there is still someone in the house young enough to actually giggle, it is not the obnoxious girl-giggle that occurs at a decibel high enough to pierce a dog's ears.
We will never have to go through the horror of finding the perfect prom dress, or wedding gown. Tears over any random thing? Do not happen in this house. (Shush! We're conveniently forgetting that I'm of the estrogen persuasion and still bawl like a baby frequently.) Coach will never be knocked out cold by the fume clouds of nail polish or polish remover.
And, mercy of all mercies, the only monthly visitor we will ever experience is the exterminator. This, if no other reason existed, would be enough to convince Coach that we are perfect just the way we are. Daughter-less.