What's that, Mom? You said the sky is blue? No, I don't think so. It looks more of a gray to me.
How can you possibly admire the clear sky? Don't you see all those clouds?
No. I'm not going to do it. You can't really make me, you know.
When did my teenager decide to adopt as his mantra I'm not really a jerk, I'll just play one for the next few years?
Jock has done almost nothing but argue with me for the last 48 hours. You might think I'm kidding, or exaggerating a little. No. Not even a little. Those last two sentences at the top? Have actually come out of his mouth in the last couple of days. Which brings up another good question: When did he get old enough, and big enough, to realize I can't MAKE him do what I want him to?
I know I'm fortunate, really I do. He's a good kid 99.99% of the time. That other teeny, tiny percentage of the time, he's only a puke to me. Which I suppose is a good thing, and I should be thankful for small favors. And even when he's being a puke, he's not nearly as disrespectful as he could be. I mean, he still looks me in the eye, doesn't interrupt me when I'm talking, and hasn't thrown out a solid I Hate You in quite some time. While he raises his voice somewhat on occasion, he doesn't outright yell at me, and he waits until I finish my sentence before he walks away from the confrontation. (That behavior, naturally, just begs me to follow him to his room and walk right in. Because I'm all about the invasion of teenage privacy. Especially if said teenager lives in my house, eats my food, and wears clothes that I have laundered. Because I don't do those things for just anyone, it stands to reason that those I DO do those things for have opened themselves up to my prying. They have been forewarned. They are most definitely aware of it, as I am not sneaky about my privacy invasions. They are probably counting the days until they move out, as that will certainly be one of the top five reasons they move. But I digress.......)
The latest round started out with daring to broach the subject of the wrestling team at the high school. The coach, who is also one of the Varsity football coaches, has been actively and aggressively recruiting Jock this season; even now that the season has already started. He's also Jock's weight lifting coach, which explains a little about why he might be thinking Jock would be a good fit. Jock is steadfastly refusing to even consider joining the team. Adamantly. Vehemently. Very, very, very strongly. Me? I don't think it would be a bad idea. I had the audacity to say that very thing to him. Obviously, he disagreed.
This teenage drama crap? Is killing me. I'm not sure how many nights I can be reduced to tears, because even though I know its a phase (and really, I don't doubt he loves me) it still hurts like a booger when he's a jerk to me.
And it can't be all that healthy to empathize with species who eat their young.