Wednesday, February 27, 2008

I Think It Might Be Time To Come Out

I am about to admit something shameful to you all. Very, very shameful. Something so embarrassing that I wouldn't admit it to people who have to see me every day. Something so awful that I'm hesitant to even mention it here. However, it has to be said. For once it's out, I'll be able to get help. Hopefully.

My name is Sports Mama, and I'm technologically challenged. (Actually, the word bandied about my office today was "technotard". I'm not sure I like that.)

I want to play with my blogger template. I want to change it, make it more "me". (When I figure out exactly what that is, I'll clue the rest of you in, never fear.) And while there are tons of places out there that can help me change the basic template, I can't really find anything to help me do what I want to do. I've seen some of your blogs, and there are things that I would totally steal if I had a clue how to do it. (And yes, now that you ask, it makes perfect sense to broadcast my deficiencies here for all to see rather than send you a discreet email directly!)

I want to put my blogroll on a separate, linked page. Same for my amazing blingage. Basically, I want to clean it up a bit. Which, in and of itself is a strange phenomenon as I am opposed on so many levels to anything that resembles housecleaning. (I kid! Please, no phone calls to the Department of Child Services! My house IS clean, I swear!)

People.... I am tired of being boring. And cluttered. Oh.... and I want to know how to embed a poll inside of a post and not on the side bar. ;) I have a VERY IMPORTANT question I would love your opinions on.

So I'm on my knees. Begging. (And believe me, while you might want to take a minute and giggle over that image, as its just about as amusing as me in my hooker boots on the baseball field the other night, It.Is.NOT.Comfortable. Either physically or figuratively.) If you know of some way to help me, please feel free to throw the suggestions at me.

Although, I will ask for slow, easy pitches, as I am not as athletically inclined as my children and there is a very high likelihood that I will somehow drop them. Also, me and directions? Not such good friends. I can get lost in a circle, so you really need to make it easy. I would suggest explaining it to me like you would a child, but I somehow think my kids might know more than I do. And I will NEVER admit that to them. Tips the power scales, don'tcha know?

Unless, of course, you all are just completely, beyond a shadow of a doubt, insanely happy with my little slice of bloggy land just the way it is. But c'mon.... I've been to your places often, ladies. And you make more changes to your "appearances" than a teenage girl does getting ready for her first date. And since it is my greatest wish in life right now to be part of the "popular" blogging crowd... hehehe... I need to get with the times. Follow along. Get a face lift.

Oh. One more thing. At some point, I'm also going to design my own award to start handing out. Its an idea I've had in my little brain for some time now, and I'm just dying to use it.

Assuming, of course, that I can ever figure out how.

*sigh*

15 comments:

Unknown said...

I hear you sister!! I am completely craving something new and exciting, up there on everybody else's level. I despise boring Blogger templates.

I know Judith Shakespeare has done practically EVERY new redesign that's popping up in the mommy blog world. I don't know/read her, but someone probably will after this post. Hang in there...it can and will be done.

***People, help Sports Mama out for crying out loud!!***

Anonymous said...

I'm as clueless as you are. The only reason I was able to change my template was because I begged Lunanik to do it for me, and she sweetly obliged. I would LOVE to design an award...again, no clue. So I'm not actually helping here, see? I'm just joining in your, um, technotard-ness. Good luck, though! And fill me in if you learn anything!!!

The Creeper said...

I haven't used blogger in some months, so I have no idea what you can/can't do with it anymore. I know when I had my blog there, I CODED the entire thing myself. Whew. Lotsa work for a blog, really. And then to make it even better, I coded Cece's old blog and made all her graphics too. Yikes. Scored me a nice Sephora gift card outta that tho, so it was a win for me.

Anyhooo, I switched to wordpress for several reasons, not the least of them was nicer standard templates, password protection for individual posts, and of course, pages!

suchsimplepleasures said...

go talk to nap warden!! or...judith shakes, she did my blog! but, both of them are awesome and reasonable!!
xoxo

Jennifer S said...

I'm on the slow end of the learning curve, for sure. My sister, who has helped with some technical issues, alternately laughs or snipes at my lack of knowledge, depending on the day.

So I'm no help. I've tried to acquaint my self with my Wordpress software, but I have a feeling I've only scratched the surface. I am trying to talk myself into paying someone to design my site. It's hard to justify, but it's very tempting and I'll probably do it before long. I have blog envy, too.

Can't wait to see what ideas you get from others.

Amy said...

Am I the first one with wisdom to impart? Since you get lost in a circle and all that, I will instruct you on how to get your blogroll on a separate page. Once that is done I will help you with more.

Step 1: Create a post that is just your blogroll. You might want to pre-date this post (under post options) so it doesn't show up at the top of your posts

Step 2: customize blog, layout, page elements and add a text page element. Type in the word "Blogroll" and hyperlink it to the post you just published.

Done.
Email me if you have any questions or want my phone number. I would love to talk to you, and not just about blog layouts.
-Amy

Unknown said...

1. I cannot even upload pictures, so you are fine 2. Go see Nap Warden. She's great & cheap. 3. Move to Wordpress.

LunaNik said...

I was going to tell you how to create a post for your blog roll and then link to it but Amy beat me to it.

That's what I did.

I also did the same thing for my Bloggy Awards. I just posted all the pics in a post and then put a link to that post in my sidebar.

I'm with you about clutter. I hate my blog looking all a mess!

I'm a total newbie with HTML but I can do some basic stuff. If you need my help don't hesitate to email me!

Amy said...

I have something for you!

Burgh Baby said...

Woman, you didn't need to beg. Amy posted the instructions, but I'll do a really detailed post this weekend. I like doing Blogger tips on the weekends when hardly anybody reads. I've had the whole "how to clean up your sidebar" thing on my list all along, I'll move it to the head of the class.

Any thoughts about what you want to do with your template? I've got some ideas that would be fun for you. Email me if you want.

Burgh Baby said...

Just in case you missed this and this, here they are. I swear, it is not as hard as it seems.

Flea said...

Oo! Thank you BBM! I'm a technotard too! I like that term, SM. :)

Karen said...

I know you're not talking to me. I am technically challenged as well. I am awaiting the crumbs from Burgh's table, er blog, so that I, too, can clean up my site.

Cecily R said...

You aren't talking to me either. It's amazing that I even figured out how to upload pictures and make my background red. SEriously. I am the definition of technologically challenged.

Anonymous said...

oh no, you're one of "them" :)

JUST kidding ... you just need to find a good mentor or teacher who's willing to make it understandable. if you want a GREAT book on blogging, check out Blogging with Moxie from Moxie Girls. You can google them. :)

(Senora Patron - drinkin' and buzzin' on a Friday nite.)